Everyday Wellness

At A Loss…

As I post today, I am at a loss.  Not at a loss for how to overcome bad habits surrounding eating, or at a loss for how to eat as our ancestor’s ate, or at a loss for how to prepare a delicious meal for my family.  That is easy for me.

I am at a loss, because I am dealing with someone’s health issue that can not be solved by my intervention. My own fathers’.

Eli first tub, Easter 2013 049

My dad battled prostate cancer over 6 years ago, after suffering a stroke 6 months prior.  He handled the radiation well, and levels went back down to normal, so we thought we were in the clear. Not so fast! It’s back, and seems to be aggressive this time. PSA levels are rapidly rising and he is feeling progressively worse over these past few days.

So what is a daughter to do? It’s too late at this point to get him to eat less cookies and more veggies. Its too late to get him to drink more water and less coffee. Its too late to encourage him to make lifestyle changes that will impact the quality of his life, so he can love the life he lives.  So I am at a loss.

My heart tells me to show empathy without trying to ‘fix’ him.  I have to support him, love him, and let him eat cake!

At this point, the quality of his life is important to me. If he wants to sit in the yard and soak up the sun, I will encourage that.  If he wants to tinker in the basement and make things, I will encourage him to do that.  If he wants me to make him N’Oatmeal Cookies weekly because that’s all he wants to eat at this point, I will do that. I love this man, and that is what matters!

I am at a loss because I am usually the fixer in many situations, but I am realizing that this situation does not need fixing.  It needs time, love,  and compassion.

february 2012 062